Tuesday, 25 October 2011


"Uncle" Marty brought his usual gift for my dad last night, a plastic bag full of cooking apples from his neighbor's tree. She's like eighty or something and gives Uncle Marty apples because she doesn't like them. He doesn't like them either. I don't even think my dad likes them, he just peels them down to the cores then eats the seeds.
Once dad told me there's enough arsenic in a pint glass full of apple seeds to kill a man. My dad is so weird.

Saturday, 22 October 2011

The Movies

Oh my god. Have you ever had one of those days where, like, everything went wrong? It seems like my whole life is made up of days like those.
Today Joanne and I were supposed to be meeting Robin Taylor and Finn and go see the new Sarah Jessica Parker movie... My dad was giving us a ride in the car but he totally took the longest detour and we ended up in the middle of like, this quarry or something... It was so embarrassing, he kept trying to talk to Joanne about I don't even know what! But we had our gameboy cable with us and we were able to trade pokemon while dad had another one of his episodes... God bless Nintendo, right? We missed the movie but Joanne said SJP looks like her skin is made of an old leather handbag anyway. She is so right.

Wednesday, 19 October 2011


Seriously, my life is so hard!
This morning when I woke up I couldn't get in the bathroom 'cause my dad was in there again, for like, two whole hours! Sometimes he's in there for like, seriously, days... And he's not even using the toilet because he never flushes or anything. It is sooo bad for you not to go to the bathroom when you need to, anyone would think my dad WANTS me to get a urine infection. Anyway when he came out he was wringing his hands and shaking, like always. It took him another ten minutes to get my pop tarts ready before school -he dropped one and actually expected me to eat it!
God, I was like sooo tardy, but it was only math. Joanne told me that when I was at home Josh Carey did a one-eighty on his board and I missed that because of my dad. Lame!

Monday, 17 October 2011

Phone conversation

Oh my god. My dad said the stupidest thing yesterday when I was trying to talk to Joanne on the phone about how weird my dad is, he said; "Amy, why won't you listen to me? Why won't you look at me? I'm trying to tell you the truth!!" My dad is so weird.